#5 Honor your father and your mother so that you may live long 🙌
It doesn’t get any simpler than that, plus, of the Ten Commandments, the fifth is the only one that comes with a promise. Not just any promise, but the promise of long life for those who honour their parents.
Join my family and me as we continue our journey through the Ten Commandments. I have to admit, in today’s world, this can be one of the hardest commandments to live out.
Have you ever stopped to wonder what it meant for the Israelites—freshly delivered from centuries of slavery—to honour their parents? What did that look like for a people learning to live in freedom under God’s covenant?
Bible reading 📖
Exodus 20:12 NIV
[12] “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.
Reflections 🙌
“…If you’re a good boy or girl, I’ll bring you a present when I get back.”
Sound familiar? 😊
Whether you’re a parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, or anyone who’s spent time with little ones, chances are you’ve said something like this before. We’ve all tried to encourage good behaviour with the promise of a reward.
But is that what God is doing in the fifth commandment? Is He simply motivating the Israelites with a promise?
I don’t believe so.
As humans, our understanding is limited. Even with all our knowledge and technological advances, we will never fully comprehend the mind of God. Yet, through His Word, He graciously reveals His heart and His purposes.
What I see in the first five commandments is God’s perfect order for His creation. First comes our relationship with God. Then comes our relationship with our parents. From there, every other relationship flows.
God is our ultimate Father.
He has given each of us mothers and fathers. Many of us become mothers and fathers ourselves, and one day our children may become parents too. It is a beautiful, God-ordained pattern that shapes families, communities, and generations. When we understand and embrace this order, we begin to see God’s purpose and design for our lives.
The remaining commandments—do not murder, do not commit adultery, do not steal, do not bear false witness, and do not covet—become natural expressions of a heart that honours God and respects those He has placed in our lives. When we break these commandments, we are not merely breaking rules. We dishonour one another, we dishonour those who raised us, and ultimately, we dishonour our Creator—God, our Heavenly Father.
Take young David, for example. As much as he may have wanted to join his older brothers on the battlefield against the Philistines, he knew that wasn’t where God had placed him. Instead, he faithfully served his father, Jesse, tending the sheep and running errands. When Jesse asked him to take food to his brothers and bring back news from the battle, David didn’t complain or make excuses. He simply obeyed. He honoured his father by faithfully carrying out what seemed like an ordinary task.
Yet it was through one of those ordinary errands that God positioned David for an extraordinary moment.
When David arrived at the camp, he heard Goliath mocking not only the army of Israel but defying the living God. While seasoned soldiers, his own brothers, and even King Saul stood paralysed by fear, this young shepherd recognised what was truly at stake—not merely a battle between armies, but a direct challenge to the honour of God. The rest, as they say, is history (1 Samuel 17).
David’s victory over Goliath began long before he picked up five smooth stones. It began with a heart that honoured his father and was faithful in the ordinary things. God used that obedience to place David exactly where he needed to be, at exactly the right time.
Similar challenges confronts us today.
How often, when we face the “Goliaths” in our own lives, do we freeze with fear and forget the God who has already proven His faithfulness? The God who loved us so much that He sent His only Son, Jesus Christ, to rescue us from the power of sin and the sting of death.
Just as the Israelites were learning to live in freedom under God’s covenant, we too, as followers of Christ, are called to live in the freedom that comes through faith in Him alone. But this freedom is not a licence to live as we please. It is an invitation to joyful obedience—to honour God in the way we love, serve, and honour one another, beginning with those He has entrusted to us as our parents or caregivers.
And how often do we allow hurt, pride, disappointment, or unforgiveness to distance us from our families—especially our parents or those who have loved, raised, and cared for us? As we’ve seen throughout this reflection, it is easy to drift into disobedience and dishonour. Yet the fifth commandment gently calls us back. It reminds us to honour our father and mother—not because they are perfect, but because God has established His good order for our lives.
When we honour our parents, or those who have faithfully fulfilled that role in our lives, we reflect a heart that honours God. And when we honour God, we learn to trust Him, even when we stand before our own giants.
Perhaps this is the deeper promise of the fifth commandment. A life lived according to God’s design is a life lived under His blessing, His wisdom, and His care. Just as David’s faithful obedience prepared him to face Goliath, our daily obedience prepares us to face whatever giants lie before us, confident that the God who calls us is the same God who goes before us.
May we, like the Israelites, learn to live in the freedom God has given us. And may we, like David, be faithful in the ordinary things, honouring those God has placed in our lives, so that when our own Goliaths appear, we will stand—not in our own strength, but in the strength of the Lord.
Prayer 🙏
Heavenly Father,
All glory, honour, and praise belong to You alone.
Thank You for the gift of our parents and for those You have placed in our lives who have lovingly fulfilled the role of a mother or father. We acknowledge that they are part of Your good design for our lives.
Help us to honour them with love, humility, patience, and grace. When we fall short, gently remind us, correct our hearts, and lead us back to the path of obedience.
Teach us to honour our parents not because they are perfect, but because You are. May our respect for them reflect our love for You, for in honouring those You have entrusted to us, we ultimately honour You.
We ask this in the precious name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Saviour.
Amen.
To God be the glory always ❤️
Idau Hahine 